Revised Introduction

This new version is more successful than the old version for a few reasons. I took out some unneeded words that I did not feel helped the paragraph very much. The most important thing that I think helped make this draft better is the thesis statement. I decided to use my other thesis statement and rewrite it a little bit in order to change some wording and make it as strong as I could make it.

NEW INTRODUCTION:  
Technology is increasing rapidly, so much so that some people believe the human race cannot keep up with the acceleration of technology. One of the largest ways that technology is improving is in the field of robotics. Robots are used in all aspects of human life including work, intimacy, and personal lives. People who are informed about the issue of rapidly increasing technology look to understand how the technical aspect of robotics will alter human life in the future. People who are not so informed may not understand the technical aspect of robots such as the systemic components, etc., but they do have emotion and culture and they are sympathetic towards their futures. The controversy over how robots will effect human life is continuously growing. Items are being published and produced predicting the future of the coinciding world of humans and robots. One University of St. Thomas undergraduate has written about his feelings towards robots and their effect on the future. He believes that robots will help humans increase productivity in the workplace, expand options for humans intimately, and cause humans to continue to grow fonder for technology in our personal lives as well. Miguel Valez, in Current and Future Relationships Between Robots and Humans, appeals to professional and amateurs in the robotics world by incorporating many aspects of rhetoric and emotion within his paper.  He uses expert sources to grant the attention of more knowledgable readers in order to persuade them with intelligence, but he also uses emotion and cultural values to connect to those who are new to the robotics world on a personal level. \ robotics realm.

OLD INTRODUCTION:

Technology is increasing rapidly.  It is increasing so dramatically that some people believe the human race cannot keep up with the acceleration of technology. There are many ways that technology is increasing and robotics is one of the most profound. Robots are being used in all aspects of human life, including work lives, intimate relationships, and also personal lives. People who are informed about the issue of rapidly increasing technology look to understand how the technical aspect of robotics will alter human life in the future. They try to understand the specific components of robots and how they will aid the future or potentially ruin it. There are also others who are not so informed. These people may not understand the mechanical and systemic components of specific robots, but they have emotion and culture and they are sympathetic towards what their futures may look like. The controversy and debate over whether robotics will help or harm human future is growing. More and more articles, papers, and other items are being published and produced predicting the future of the coinciding world of humans and robots. One University of St. Thomas undergraduate has written about his feelings towards robots and their effect on the future. He believes that robots will help humans increase productivity in the workplace, expand options for humans intimately, and cause humans to continue to grow fonder for technology in our personal lives as well. In Current and Future Relationships Between Robots and Humans, Miguel Valez appeals to both a knowledgeable and unknowledgeable audience by using rhetorical strategies and situations along with implementing cultural values throughout the paper. Valez draws the attention of robotics fanatics and professionals by referencing expert sources from the robotics realm, but he also captures the lesser informed audience by appealing to emotion and incorporating cultural values within his paper.